Monday, February 4, 2008

CSI: Our house - Today's episode: Vanished

Since TV stinks lately (not that I watch TV much anymore since I started blogging), I am bringing you some CSI episodes courtesy of our home this week. The first episode is Vanished!

I am missing spoons. This is not a metaphor; I am seriously missing spoons from my kitchen. This bugs me to no end. In any household with living, breathing humans, one can expect there will be some losses and casualties along the way. We all know of the missing sock or the glove with no matching partner. We realize that a glass will break or a plate will shatter because we are human and we drop or mishandle. The electrical cord for AC adaptation for anything needing charging is anywhere but the logical spot. Pens are never where they need to be, pads of paper – forget about it! But SPOONS? Come on!

One of the things that irritates me about our spoon shortage is that there is absolutely no logical explanation. Gloves, pens, paper, and sock losses usually can be explained. There is the occasional foot shuffle that pushes the sock under the bed or the dryer. Every so often, these items can get left behind during a trip or an outing. Electrical cords are simply mislaid or thrown into any convenient storage drawer. Pens and paper are misplaced by all ages and genders in our family. At first, I blamed the kids thinking they took the spoons outside or snuck them in their rooms or the basement. However, I have looked in these areas and I can find no trace of food or spoon. The lawnmower should surface a lawn spoon and there would be no basis for a spoon outdoors, barring the patio table, anyway.

But, what really frustrates me the most about this is it is truly JUST SPOONS. The forks are all present and accounted for. Knives – no issues. Serving spatulas – ready for duty. But spoons are disappearing. At first this phenomenon was limited to my smaller dessert spoons; however, recently, a long stirring teaspoon went MIA. I have searched drawers thinking they were misplaced. I have looked under the kitchen rug wondering if perhaps they morphed into the ceramic tile below. I have explored the bottom of the dishwasher and even took out the filter thinking there was some sort of a spoon slot for careless placement of spoons in the basket. All to no avail. My only other hope is that Brian is messing with me. That he is somehow hiding the spoons in the engine of the car or by the water softener (the only places he would frequent and I would avoid like the plague). That he enjoys seeing me get riled every time I empty the dishwasher silverware basket thinking that magically more have appeared since the last wash – as socks sometimes do. Brian, if you are reading this, please come clean. Soon, I will have to buy new silverware (and dishes to match).

If Brian is to blame, that should solve it.

What strange things do you find missing in your house?


  1. I have the same problem with spoons and forks. I got a clue one time when I looked in the trash before I scraped my plate - and there was a fork sitting there in the trash. Guess when I told my kids to "scrape their plates" they scraped the silverware off too. One day, I will buy a whole new set of silverware - until then, the kids eat most their meals with plastic!

  2. Just found you through Jenn-nice place you've got here!

    I have the same issue with spoons. I've come up with a hypothesis that the four kids in my house are occasionally taking them to school with yogurt or applesauce and are either throwing them out, or throwing them in the tray with all the government issued flatware the school uses.

    As brilliant as that theory is, I have no solution to offer you.

  3. I agree with Angi and Amy. My kids "accidentally" throw spoons, forks, plates, etc. away. I think they are rebelling against having to take their plates to the sink when they are finished eating. Just my theory...

  4. That is so weird! I have the same problem! What is it with spoons?

  5. The first thing I thought is that someone is messing with you. I hope you find them. If not, a good excuse to go shopping anyway. But if you're like me, you hate shopping. Brian - put back the spoons.

  6. LOL - That's funny... I just found a spoon behind my desk! I had finished a yogurt, and those darn things won't stand up with the spoon in them when they are empty and it must have gotten pushed behind the desk. I threw it away because it was gross, but I still found it!

    Hope you solve the case of the missing spoons :)

  7. The only time I have been missing spoons is when my hubby got sick of the ones that the garbage diposal put knicks into and he threw away because they cut his mouth.
    I can't seem to find the fly swatter. I have no idea?! I even told my kids I would pay them if they found it, no luck. I buy another one (they are so expensive he he)and sure enough it disappears. I am beginning to think it is the flies. Maybe they suddenly wised up and banned together and disposed of the killer of their ancestors.
    Good Luck with the spoons!!


  8. Visiting from Leanne's. I so can relate to this post! Our utensils are missing, our remote is missing and even one of our portable phones is now MIA!

    I have no advice, just pain to share. :)

  9. I not only lose spoons, I also mysteriously gain spoons (from a flatware set that is not mine).

    I think it is the yogurt/pudding cup phenomenom. Every once in a while my neighbors and I straighten out our sets!

  10. Yeah, I'm losing spoons too! Makes sense what others are saying about them being tossed out with pudding/yogurt/jello cups.

  11. I once had the same problem with spoons disappearing. My girl's father always carried his lunch to work with him. Along with a ham and cheese sandwich he took a baggie with chips and a snack size can of fruit. The canned fruit required a spoon. About every third or fourth month I would have to buy dessert spoons but no one could explain while they were disappearing. I was home one afternoon when 'he' came home from work and I, being the sweet wife I was, emptied out his lunch box. Inside I found the cup he carried juice in, no paper, no dessert cup, and no spoon so I asked him what he did with the spoon he took to eat his fruit with. THEN it all fell together ... when he turned his lunch box upside down over the trash can to dump out all the paper products and fruit cup ... he was also dumping the spoon! I ended up buying a box of plastic spoons and made him start using those. I bought new dessert spoons to replace what was missing and BEHOLD ... Spoons never came up missing again!

  12. me too. I think someone is smoking crack. I'm about to go into invesitgate.