Saturday, July 10, 2010

I took another step towards becoming crazy cat lady this week...

So, you may remember from last summer and fall that I struggled with certain things relating to moving on in my tangible world after Brian’s death. One of those things was purging his items and taking over that space.


Taking over his space has remained an issue for me for a variety of reasons, none of which have anything to do with guilt associated with moving on. (Oh what wonders time and God have done for relieving me of guilt associated with moving forward with life!)

One reason I have for not wanting to take over Brian’s living quarters is that I don’t want to accept that I have a problem. That problem being a surge in my wardrobe, thus requiring more space. Facts are facts, though and suddenly my bras and panties do not fit in one drawer as they used to. My shorts are overflowing and constantly wrinkled being shoved into the allotted space they used to occupy. My jewelry will no longer allow the door on the mirror/box to close effectively. Call it retail therapy. Call it a desire to change and update my look. Call it whatever you want. I’m busting at the seams and I need more room.

Another reason I have not wanted to invade drawers and closets that have remained empty for the last several months is that if I admit I take up this much room, how am I ever going to have enough space for someone else in my life? And this is what I know: I want someone else in my life. I want it to be the right person and I am trusting God to provide in this context, but I really want to share my life again someday. If I continue like this, I’ll have to add on unless they come bearing only one carryon and one checked bag. (I won’t even charge for it.)


Finally, to invade Brian’s space means succumbing to both the above facts and facing that I am single that much longer. I know that some people that have been single and not accountable to another adult for extended durations of time can become… well… strange. They develop strange standards for living and home life. Bizarre habits can form. They get irritable and intolerable and easily annoyed. They just get a little odd. I don’t want to admit that I could become that person the longer I am single.



Still, with the breakup of the boyfriend I am nowhere near sharing my life and space with someone, and with the expanding wardrobe and overflowing accessory arsenal, I could use some extra space. I HAVE the space. I just didn’t want to admit I needed to use it. So, I took over two empty drawers this week with my personal belongings.

I guess I will just have to trust in the efficacy of Space Bags if I ever do find love again.

KEEP BELIEVING

12 comments:

  1. I believe you will know when it is time to claim the space. I also believe that you will find the perfect partner (again) one day.

    And I'm sure you need all those clothes because in every picture I see you look stunning.

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  2. I've seen previews of Hoarders... you're OK as long as you can still put your stuff in drawers. So, for the love of not being fodder for a reality show... put it in a drawer... any drawer!!

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  3. Thanks for the laugh with that video :) A girl can never have too many clothes.

    Don't worry I will leave you a comment and tell you if you make any crazy cat lady posts :)

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  4. I'm so glad to see you are alright and life is going forward for you and your boys. I'm sure you will find "a new normal" again sometime soon. That is my prayer for you. I think you are so wise to look forward and you are trying to live in the "now" and not in the "before". You are way to young to be alone for long.
    In the meantime, clean out your drawers - fill them with your things. (smile)

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  5. You have been missed! You are young and attractive and the Lord has someone in mind for you....remember it is all in His time.

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  6. Enjoy having shorts that aren't wrinkled! You know we will expect perfectly pressed shorts for now on. ;-) When you meet the right guy - he will accept you for you - including all the space you need for jewelry and clothes! So glad to see a post from you - have so been wondering how you are!

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  7. This is quite funny. Just the thought of someone treating their cat like that makes me laugh.

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  8. Uh oh. Crazy Cat Lady strikes a chord with me...

    :-)

    You made me smile today, dear lady.
    I can attest to the power of retail therapy....and I'm proud, and giggling, that you've taken the step of moving your goods into two more drawers.

    Dear me...you are so freakin' healthy!!!

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  9. This is fabulous.
    Kind of reminds me of how I talk to my cats..

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  10. Glad to see you are doing just fine... and for the love of life, use the space!!! The above commentor was correct, if you've still GOT drawer space for the "stuff", you're not a hoarder..lol..

    You look terrific, Angie.. in body and spirit. Very mature attitude with the boyfriend, the right reasons to say it ain't work'n. The right one will come along and then you'll just know, for now enjoy your freedom. REALLY!...

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  11. Use the space you have. When the right person comes along, you can decide what to do with your stuff. Who knows if you will live in your house at that time--you might be moving into a much bigger home.

    You are very good at living in the NOW, this using of the space you have is just a part of that process. When you reach a new "NOW" in your life, The Lord will help you deal with all kinds of different options.

    I agree with the commenter who said "enjoy your freedom."

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  12. You really don't need to force your self to be trap on that situation like that. I agree with them you really need to enjoy your freedom and wait for the right person for that space you left.I do enjoy reading your post.Thank you for sharing.

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