Thursday, March 19, 2009

Here we go...

Friday morning starts the formalities.

Please pray for me as I see Brian's body on Friday morning.
Pray for my boys as they see the body of their Daddy for the first time since Saturday.
Pray for me - I have been experiencing a lot of anxiety in anticipation of this.
Pray for us - that we remember this time. I know it will be a beautiful representation of the kind of life Brian lived.
Pray for good weather.
Pray for all of us to handle this with the same dignity and grace that Brian displayed his entire life.


KEEP BELIEVING

77 comments:

  1. Corey and I love you all so much and we will continue to pray for what you have asked. See you Friday, Angie. Janell H.

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  2. Angie, I will be praying for you, and your whole family.
    "Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you." Psalms 55:22.
    Liz, WA. state.

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  3. Angie, I am with you in spirit. I get what you're saying about your anxiety in anticipation of the boys seeing Brian. Of course they will be sad and you will too. It is natural for a mom to want to fix things and make things right. I pray that God gives you peace about this, and that you are able to give some of your burden to the Lord. We all love you so much.

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  4. Sweetie, God will be right there with you during this time and you will have more prayers than you can ever imagine.

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  5. I am keeping you and your boys in my heart tomorrrow. I can not imagine how difficult this is.

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  6. I am praying for everything you have asked for. God will be with you to comfort you and your boys. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug.

    Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. - 1 Peter 5:7

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  7. I've added you and your family to my Fearless Friday Meme, sharing your link, so others will be praying and standing in the gap for all of you...((hugs)))

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  8. Dear Angie,

    We pray for each your needs. Last Wedsneday in church community I rememeber you Grant and Gavin and I offered each your anxiety to Jesus Christ died in cross.
    I love you so much and It looks like We are there with you. Let know us your news. It's so hard feeling God's love in this time and we pray Lord give you the great gift of peace.
    I am sure that when You'll read every post from all over the world for Brian you'll become stronger in God's love.

    Peace and sweets

    Emanuele and Claudia Plasmati from Alba (Piemonte - Italy)
    manuplasmati@tiscali.it

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  9. Angie, Gavin and Grant,
    I will be praying for you all day today that you will be brave and strong and live up to everything that Brian (your Daddy) believed you are able to do.
    God, please surround this family as they say goodbye to a loved one who will never leave their hearts.
    Karen

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  10. We will all be praying to give you strength... but based on what I've read here, I know you have a lot more than you think.

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  11. Praying. Loving. Hugging.

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  12. You have, also, displayed much dignity and strength, an amount that seems unfathomable to most of us. But you have done it and you will continue to do it...we continue to KEEP BELIEVING in you and your boys. Many prayers sent your way.

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  13. I will hold you all in my heart today - I hope you get what you need to make it through this.

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  14. Thinking of and praying for you all...

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  15. Thinking of you on this special day ... one that I hope becomes a lasting good memory and celebration of Brian's life.
    I just pray that you are feeling free from anxiety and sheltered by God's love and the love of all of your family and friends that will be with you today.
    I'll be there in spirit, praying you through the day.

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  16. Angie, So sorry I can't make it there for Friday night or Saturday. I think TJ's planning on going. You will be fine, God will give you the strength you need to go through these rough times. The boys will also make it through with God and your love. Please know that we will be praying for you! Love, Tracy

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  17. Angie,
    Praying for what you need. God will guide you all in the next few days. Remember you are not alone - family and friends are here for you.
    Love,
    Gretchen

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  18. Praying and will continue to do so...

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  19. Dearest Angie, Grant and Gavin,
    This morning during my quiet with our Lord, I prayed for your peace and comfort knowing that today will be an especially difficult one for you.

    Angie, your strength and courage have been inspirational. There is no doubt in my mind that today will be hard for you and the boys, but I know with our God's support you will use this day as a time to remember the good times and to celebrate Brian's heavenly presence.

    In Christian love and affection,
    Cathy

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  20. I KNOW BEYOND A SHADOW OF ANY DOUBT that Brian is going to lift you all up today as he stands next to Jesus...who has always been there holding you. I can't help but remember the "Footprints" poem that we all know and love....these are your days to be carried....and you WILL BE. Draw on that strength today, tomorrow, and all the coming days. Brian is right beside you holding your hand...and we will be holding the other one.

    LOVE and PEACE to you all,
    Kris

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  21. Praying for you all and praying for Jen as well!
    The Harper Family from Ironton MO

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  22. Dear Angie,Gavin and Grant.
    Our prayers are with you today. God will be holding you and your family in his hands.
    Peace and God be with you.

    The Sanders family

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  23. Dearest Angie Gavin and Grant,
    we are praying for all that you need today,
    wishing we could be there with you.
    As God is guiding you, so He is with the boys, giving them comfort and peace.
    Love you Marjo and family

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  24. Angie, Gavin, and Grant,

    My heart is aching for all of you. You were all so lucky to have Brian in your lives, even for a short time. He will continue to be with you in spirit, watching over you, watching the boys grow and beeming with pride for what he helped create. God's love will guide you through this emotional journey; lean on Him.

    Shelli in Ohio

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  25. We are praying here for you and the boys. For all those things and more!

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  26. May serenity and the grace of the Holy Spirit surround you all.

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  27. I'm praying for you. All of you.
    God bless!

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  28. ::hugs:: Love and prayers coming your way.

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  29. Angie,
    We pray that peace can replace the feeling of anxiety today. Our prayers are with you this difficult day and the days to come.

    Landau Gang

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  30. Praying for you all right now. May you feel The Lord's presence and strength.

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  31. I haven't stopped thinking of and praying for you for weeks. I know you will make it through today with your characteristic strength.

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  32. Angie, May the Word of God strengthen you through this weekend. You do not grieve without hope, sweet friend. Jesus Christ's victory over death is going to have the last word. Brian has been given a glorified body. One day, the body that you are saying goodbye to this weekend will be raised to one we cannot imagine, never to die again. The earthly body that Brian had is asleep for now, but one day with be raised immortal and perfect forever!

    1 Corinthians 15:42-44,50-57 (New Living Translation)

    42 It is the same way with the resurrection of the dead. Our earthly bodies are planted in the ground when we die, but they will be raised to live forever. 43 Our bodies are buried in brokenness, but they will be raised in glory. They are buried in weakness, but they will be raised in strength. 44 They are buried as natural human bodies, but they will be raised as spiritual bodies. For just as there are natural bodies, there are also spiritual bodies.

    50 What I am saying, dear brothers and sisters, is that our physical bodies cannot inherit the Kingdom of God. These dying bodies cannot inherit what will last forever.

    51 But let me reveal to you a wonderful secret. We will not all die, but we will all be transformed! 52 It will happen in a moment, in the blink of an eye, when the last trumpet is blown. For when the trumpet sounds, those who have died will be raised to live forever. And we who are living will also be transformed. 53 For our dying bodies must be transformed into bodies that will never die; our mortal bodies must be transformed into immortal bodies.

    54 Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled:

    “Death is swallowed up in victory.
    55 O death, where is your victory?
    O death, where is your sting?”

    56 For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. 57 But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ.

    Praying for the grace that Jesus Christ has apportioned for you, Grant, and Gavin for this very weekend and all the days to follow. May you know that grace which has the supernatural power to overshadow and assuage the grief that you are experiencing. My love to you, dear friend--Shawn from TN

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  33. Angie, this is very rough. I will definitely pray for you. My heart is with you today. I will be there tomorrow.

    Noelle

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  34. Angie...I've been thinking about you so much since getting the update on Brian. I CANNOT imagine what you're going through and the mixture of relief, grief, anxiety that you're experiencing...relief only in knowing that Brian is no longer suffering and is walking, talking, running, and jumping with Jesus! But, facing life without him must seem impossible!Please know that Jeremy and I are praying! Jill <><

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  35. You have been in my thoughts constantly this week. Praying that God holds you all in the palm of His hand today.

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  36. Prayers continuing for you. Please know that you have shown amazing grace and dignity through all this...more than anyone ever would expect from any human.

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  37. You all have been added to our family prayer intentions.

    The Alderinks

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  38. I am praying so hard for all of you Angie. Strength and love your way. xoxo.

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  39. Angie, I am Gretchen's mother in law and just wanted to extend my sympathies. I pray that God gives you the strength you need to face the days ahead. God bless you and your boys. Pat Willis

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  40. Sweetheart, I'm so sorry you are hurting and facing this loss. So so so sorry. I know that God is our father and he loves you, his daughter, more than any of us could. Jesus wept when he learned of Lazarus' death from Lazarus' sisters - His heart understands, honey. Truly..

    And it's ok if you need to just not be strong for a bit.

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  41. Again, I feel that my words are inadequate, so I am so thankful that I can trust in God's presence to comfort you, and His strength to sustain you. I will be thinking of you and praying for you all in the days to come.

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  42. Praying for all of you today. I pray that God gives you grace and peace, and comforts you as you need.

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  43. Dear Angie, Gavin and Grant,
    I am praying for you as you face the next few weeks and months without Brian. I cannot imagine what you are going through. Keep believing. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding," Proverb 3:5.

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  44. You are all in my prayers during this very difficult time. God bless you.

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  45. Angie, I don't think I've ever commented here before, but I've been following your family's story for a couple of months. I don't really have any words, except to say how profoundly you have touched me. I am praying for you and your precious boys.

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  46. Angie, all day I watched the clock, and wondered how you were doing. I added the extra 2hours, from my time zone to yours, and asked God to give you all the strength that you and your boys would need to get through this day. I knew you would be attending your husbands funeral. Something you probably never thought you'd have to do so soon in your life.
    I read about Bryan's death, and last night when I went to bed, I listened to my husband snoring. And realized what a wonderful sound it truly is. I hope I hear it for many more years. Through you, I have learned what is important in life. It's character. And honey, you have it. I have been visiting your blog since Nov. 2007, and you have never talked about, "why me?". You have never been negative..or annoyed at the situation you were faced with. You never blamed God. I'm so glad. God didn't do this.. Sin did.. It's sad when God gets the blame, when He loves you so much, and it hurts when He is falsly accused. I will always remember how you handled this heavy burden, with grace, dignity, peace, integrety (sp), and hope. Never giving up. I will try to be stronger if I am ever faced with such a situation. I hope I am half the woman you are. I will seek God more often, and focus on a stronger relationship with him. You have had a profound impact on my life.. You and Bryan. Thank-you so much, for letting hundreds of strangers to become a part of this personal time of joy and pain in your life.. I will be praying for you.. always..
    Liz from WA. state..

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  47. I hadn't visited your blog for a few weeks, so I had no idea what was going on. I cried as I read your latest posts. My prayers are with you, the boys, and everyone who knew Brian.

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  48. You have been in my prayers all day Angie. Continue to lean on those around you for strength and courage. Your grace, dignity, and integrity is truly something to admire. May God surround you with feelings of love and peace in the coming days. You will always be in my prayers.

    Ashley

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  49. Loving you and asking for peace, rest, and healing for you and the boys.

    I'm so glad that Brian has all three now.

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  50. I have thought about you and your family so many times today. I pray that at this moment, 10:45 p.m., you are resting peacefully, wrapped in warm memories of Brian and the love you share. Notice, I did not say 'shareD'.

    I truly believe that the God of Wonder in whom we so strongly believe does not take away our memories of those left behind just because we enter into His presence. He would not give us such strong bonds and then just cut them off. I believe that he allows us to stay close and watch over one another until we are all gathered into His arms and taken, finally, home for good. Because I believe that, I know that Brian is with you, wrapping his love around you. Close your eyes and open your heart; you will feel him.

    Sleep well, sweet woman. You have done an amazing job of making your lives a shining example of what God's love can accomplish if we allow him to work within us. There is no reason to believe that you will not continue to shine -- even on the days when the emotional tide is so high that you fear you might drown. Then, reach out for Brian. God will let him come and, together, they will lift you back up so you can stand on your own again.

    And in the moments when the waves wash over you and, like Job, you wonder why you were born if you have to go through all this pain and loneliness (Job 3 & 4), know that it's OK with God if you rail, and scream, and cry, and question. He understands that as humans, during the trials of our lives, we have to go through all of the emotions He imbued us with. They are part of the growth process. And know that Brian is there with you, holding you and comforting you through it all. And know that this community of people, most of whom have never laid eyes on you, has come to love you as one of our own and that any one of us would gladly be there for you in any way in our power that we can possibly help.

    I will close with this one last thing. You know that in my world, music carries meaning beyond mere words. And I truly believe that there are reasons why certain songs come into my head at specific times. As I sat here typing this, one song kept playing over and over in my mind. It is The Beatles-Golden Slumbers Carry That Weight The End. If you've never heard it, please go listen when you have a few spare minutes. I believe it is supposed to be a message for you. (Yes, I know I'm weird. But I'm usually right.) The last line of the song is, "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." Angie, of all the people I've met, I believe that the love you and Brian have, the family you made, and the life you shared is the best example of God's love with us I've ever seen. And in the end, it will return to you in more than equal share.

    I wish you Peace, Blessings, and Warmth in the knowledge that you are not now and will never be alone.

    xoxoxo

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  51. Praying and I have been thinking of you all constantly today.

    hugs,
    kristen

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  52. Oh Angie, I am praying for you for sure. My family will hold hands at breakfast tomorrow and send you our deepest thoughts of love and strength.

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  53. May God bless and keep his soul... may he bathe in the Light of Eternal Peace and Love. May God grant you and your children the strength to remain in Hope.

    Yours
    Matt & Jen and kids, New Berlin, WI

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  54. Praying for you, always. And for the boys.

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  55. Praying for y'all! I am here from Angie Smith's blog.

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  56. I wanted to express how deeply deeply sorry I am for your loss. My heart breaks when I think of what you and your boys are going through, and I will keep you all in my prayers.

    God bless you,
    Melody (CA)

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  57. Sending prayers your way from Florida

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  58. You do not know me and we will never meet but as I read the heading of your blog and then read the latest blog entry, I immediately began crying for the loss your family, especially your sons, has so recently experienced...please know that your message of "Keep Believing" IS reaching others. I am in prayer for your family... Melissa in Maryland

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  59. You were absolutely amazing. Brian was so proud.
    Kara

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  60. Came here from Bring the Rain - praying for you and the boys.

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  61. Praying for peace for you and your children, today, tomorrow and all the days ahead.

    Jennifer in Texas

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  62. Never seen your blog before today. I'm praying for you, your sons, and your famiy. Praying for peace, comfort, and strength.

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  63. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I've read through your blog and I'm so sorry that the road has been so difficult for you and your family. No one should ever have to go through what you've been through.

    I will be saying a prayer for you and your boys.

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  64. My deepest condolences. Found your blog through Bring the Rain.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you all, May the Lord grant you peace, strength and faith. May He wrap his loving arms around you and comfort you.

    Em
    from Australia

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  65. I lost my husband on 3/1/09 to non-hodgkins lymphoma after a week battle! I have a little boy that is ~6 named GRANT and I am 32 weeks pregnant with AUBREY. I will be praying for you! Stop by my blog if you have a chance and see how we delt with the same things a couple of weeks ago www.mckayfamilylife.blogspot.com
    Emily

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  66. I am so very sorry. I will continue to pray for your family. (I originally read about this on Blog This Mom's site and have been praying since.)

    I didn't realize until I read Brian's obituary that he was born 30 years before my daughter. Same day. I almost lost her on New Year's Day and... well, you know.

    Again, I'm sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you and your family.

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  67. I lost my husband to cancer in 2005. Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. You and your boys will be in my prayers.

    Christy from St. Louis
    http://lifeafterukraine.blogspot.com/

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  68. Came over from "Bring the Rain" blog...
    Praying for you, your boys and family during this difficult time!

    May God wrap his arms around you and comfort you.

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  69. Angie: I found your blog from Kelly's Corner blog. I sobbed reading some of your posts, and am amazed at your honesty and grace. You sound like an awesome mother and wife...I was particularly touched at how great you are at talking to your boys about all that is going on. My own father got a "promotion" to heaven when I was just 4 years old, and I was like your son who didn't talk much about it. Mom says one day I just broke down and finally sobbed about it. It sounds like you are doing an amazing job as a mom and I admire your faith and courage. I will lifting you guys up in prayer.

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  70. Angie,

    Although I do not know you, your story has touched my life along with hundreds of other people who have been following your blog. I live near you, and heard of your blog through Brian's obituary. I just wanted to say that I will pray for you and your boys & the rest of your family during this difficult time. I know that the services were last Friday, but I will continue to pray for you during the most difficult times ahead. You are such a strong person and you are such an insipiration to me as a mother. I cannot imagine having to go through such an ordeal and being as strong as you are for your boys. I know Brian is looking over all of you and will until the day that you all meet with him again. God Bless...

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  71. Does the blog world realize that today is your birthday? I am wishing you a day full of peace and rest. I love you my dear friend.

    Janell

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  72. I just wanted to let you know I am praying for you and your entire family during this time. I hope God can hold you in your grip as you grieve your husband.

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  73. I will include you in my prayers. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Found your blog from Kelly's Korner. I am originally from Knoxville, IL. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer that has spread to her brain. She starts her second round of whole head radiation at the end of this week. I'm so sorry for your loss.

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  74. Today is March 23, and I realized it is your birthday. I know it probably wont be a happy day, but I wanted to acknowledge it anyway. Praying for you.. May God give you peace. Liz, WA St.

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  75. I found your blog on Kelly's Korner, but am previously from Peoria and work for the same company Brian did. Please know you and your beautiful boys are in my prayers!

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